Archive for the ‘Inspiration’ Category

The Art of Truly Listening

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Have you ever gone to a party and found yourself drawn to person you’ve never met before, who seemed to be completely interested in you and everything you had to say? It’s like finding a new best friend, someone you seem to click with right away. That person usually only did one simple thing that made you feel special – they listened to you.

Listening seems to be a dying art. In today’s world of social media, oversharing, and selfies, we seem to be turning into people who want to showcase ourselves, but never really invest the time in learning about others. That can really hurt us in our personal lives and in our professional careers. If you are thinking that it’s a new year, and you want to turn things around in your business, this is one of the simplest things you can do that I promise will pay off. LISTEN.


As an extrovert myself, this is something I definitely had to work on in my own life and career. Early in my design business, I had so many ideas and thoughts that I wanted to share them immediately with my clients, without actually giving them the space and time to tell me what they wanted and needed. I once even had a client say, “Are you listening to me?” before I actually slowed down and thought about how this was impacting me and my business. Over my 17 years in business, I’ve learned to ask a lot of questions and to really and truly listen to what the other person is saying. It’s made a huge difference in my design work, and in my business as a whole! Who am I kidding – it’s helped my personal life, too!

It’s so critical to focus on what another person is telling us. It does more than just make them feel important – you can learn so much about the other person and what they need. But you are also giving them a great customer service experience that will improve your bottom line. After all, according to Jonah Berger in his book Contagious, when people talk about themselves and are given the opportunity to share opinions, it activates their brains like a reward does, like when they are given food or money. And all of those chemicals that make them feel good are giving them a really good feeling about YOU.


Remember though, you can’t sit there thinking about what you’re going to say next while you’re supposedly listening to that other person. You have to really LISTEN, taking in everything they are actually saying, as well as their body language and non-verbal cues. You want to lean in, to ask questions at the appropriate time, and to give them the spotlight that they want and deserve. Imagine what a different world we might have today if we spent more time focusing on someone else instead of taking yet another selfie.

Instead of being selfish with your time and attention, learn to give it away freely and openly. It will make you a better person, a better customer service provider, and a much more effective businessperson!

What do think of this simple but radical idea? Let me know in the comments section below. I’m listening!







Saturday’s Secret Sauce: Reviewing Your Goals Daily

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Celebrate every tiny victory! (2)

Happy Saturday, Friends! And Happy 2016.

I haven’t been as great at blogging on weekends in the past several months (aka all of 2015). And I don’t like that because my posts and topics on the weekends are really some of my favorites. There’s nothing I like more than pouring a second cup of coffee and writing a post while still in my PJ’s.

So why wasn’t I blogging? Well it’s because I have been too busy working on my 4 product lines. Or I was doing client work on Saturdays because during the week I was working on product lines. Or maybe because I was designing my own home each Saturday because during the week I was working on product lines. Or another reason was I was resting on the weekend because you guessed it!  Yes, I had been working on product lines.

Ha! Can you see that there was a theme to 2015? I really put out some significant work and achievements in 2015 but that didn’t leave a lot of time for anything else.

Celebrate every tiny victory! (4)

So today on this first Saturday of 2016, I wanted to blog with a new title. I wanted to call today Saturday’s Secret Sauce. Why? Because I do a ton of reading and studying in the areas of business and self-help. I take lots of classes and courses online about business and about life. And often times in the realm of these books and courses you hear mention of “the Secret Sauce”.

What does that mean, you might ask? Well here’s a definition from one online source. “Secret Sauce is that elusive quality that makes something distinctive or special. It’s hard to put your finger on it, but you know it when you see it.”

Oxford Dictionary defines it as “A special feature or technique kept secret by an organization and regarded as being the chief factor in it’s success.”

So for Saturday’s Secret Sauce, two things come to mind. First, a blog on one of the things that I think is the “Secret Sauce” to a great life. And for me that means a life of reaching my goals, cherishing family and focusing on my health. And secondly, I think this is a fun place for me to share one of my favorite recipes, because a lot of you know (maybe because you follow me on Instagram) that I LOVE to cook. My daughter loves to cook too and we are always whipping up yummy recipes sometimes from cookbooks, sometimes from Blue Apron, and sometimes old family recipes from my mom or my grandmothers and great-grandmother. So here’s a fun way for me to bring together two things I really love…self help and cooking.

Today for Saturday’s Secret Sauce I’ll keep it short and sweet (with a little savory mixed in, too!)

Celebrate every tiny victory! (3)

As I come off a week of reviewing my 2015 accomplishments and writing my goals for 2016, there is one thing that I think may be the Secret Sauce to success for me more than anything else this year and it’s this–You will achieve your goals if you 1.) Write them Down and  2.) Review Your Goals Daily if possible, and a minimum of a Weekly review.

Why do I think this is so important? Well I realized that I didn’t revisit my goals, particularly my health goals, on a regular basis last year or maybe ever really. I have always written my goals down. But I noticed I just checked in maybe once or twice over that 12 month period. And staying on top of my health and wellness was one area where I fell short last year, so I have to imagine what that area of my life might look like with daily focus.

Now just to be clear, I am lucky that I am in good health. I don’t have any major health issues or disease that I know so many people deal with. But I didn’t eat as clean as planned. I put on a few pounds that I feel better without, and I had too much sugar and my joints are screaming at me because of it.

In analyzing my year and thinking of what would have made a difference for me in reaching more of what I set out to, I realized that if I had been reviewing my goal to be healthy daily, there would have been a MUCH greater chance I would have decided to eat better or not let my exercise fall off on days I was tired or when I was traveling which are my two biggest goal killers. Often times, it’s the out of sight, out of mind scenario that keeps me from doing what I planned. I just literally don’t think about it because I’m busy. Or I let other negative thoughts creep in like–“I’m too tired” or “I don’t feel like it”  or “It’s too hard to do this when I travel” that keep me from being my best.

Celebrate every tiny victory! (5)

I am a big goal setter. I have been for years and I accomplish a lot so I think it works for me. But how do I set myself up for even more success? This year my secret sauce is going to be reviewing my goals daily. So I already have them written in a journal and also on my iPhone. And I scheduled a time in my calendar for daily review, plus I set a reminder on my phone so I don’t forget.

There is NO WAY I am letting this daily goals review discipline fall off my Calendar this year and I know I will be healthier at the end of 2016 because of it.  Thankfully, right next to my goals this year, I am writing down in my journal what excuses I might come up with to not be healthy, or not work out and if I am looking at my list daily, I will have a hard time letting my excuses keep me from my goals. I’ll likely grin to myself when I read those excuses as I was just about to use one of them and then I’ll drag my “I’m too tired self” right over to my treadmill or out to meet my Walking Buddy Brandy and we’ll make it happen in spite of my excuses.

So there is it friends. My first thought about the Secret Sauce that will make me my best this year. In the comments below, let me know if you think this might be the secret sauce for you to reach your goals this year too!

And while you are pondering my Short and Sweet advice, here’s something Savory for you to dive into to get your Veggies in this year.
mom's veggie soup

Mom’s Veggie Soup:

1 pound of Ground Beef ( I use the 95% lean version to make it healthier)

Chopped Cabbage (I buy the slaw mix at the grocery store so it’s already cut up and oh so easy!)

1 onion small diced

1 can of Rotel

1 package of Frozen Soup Veggies

1 package of Frozen Gumbo Mix Veggies

Tomato Juice (46 ounces)

Water (I just add about a cup, but you can decide the perfect consistency for you)

Sugar (about 1/4 cup but you can also use Splenda or Stevia if you prefer.)

Salt and Pepper to Taste.

Brown your ground beef and drain it. Add in the cabbage and onion and cook with the drained ground beef so it starts to soften (1-2 minutes), add in all other ingredients and bring to a boil. Lower heat and simmer for at least an hour. Then enjoy. I love to make a pot of this in my Staub 5 1/2 quart Cocette (it’s the perfect size and you can get yours here!) and eat it for my lunch for an entire week. Yum!

Happy Saturday, Happy Goal-setting and Happy Cooking! xo,

Tobi Signature






My Year in Review 2015

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Celebrate every tiny victory! (1)

Wow! What a year 2015 has been. I have this tradition of writing about all the amazing things that happen each year on the last day of December to help me to remember to stop and smell the roses – to celebrate all that I have accomplished. For super-driven, Type A people like me, it’s so easy to just move on to the next thing without giving cheers for the hard work and rewards my team and I have achieved this year. Taking the time not only to celebrate, but more importantly taking an opportunity for me to thank all the people that were part of my year, is very important to me!

So I hope you will be inspired to do the same for your accomplishments and to take just a minute to remember all that you did this year before closing the books on it and moving into 2016. Thank you for indulging me as I look back on all that made 2015 great for me and thank you for being a part of it all!

product launches

2015 was an amazing year defined by big product launches for me. In fact, in this calendar year, I launched 4 new licensed collections with 4 amazing partners; CR Laine Furniture, Soicher Marin Art Company, Woodbridge Furniture, and Duralee Fabrics.


What a dream come true to work with these fantastic partners to make beautiful and functional products to help make your home all you dream it to be. But product design was not all I did this year so let’s take a look…

cr laine launch

In January I had another very exciting dream come true. I launched Tobi U – my online learning center for interior designers. It’s where designers and creatives everywhere can get my classes and courses right in their own homes from their computers. This was a fabulous way to start off the new year!

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I also was honored to be featured on the cover of At Home in Arkansas’s The Design Issue as one of the Top Interior Designers in the state. What great company I was in. Thanks, At Home in Arkansas, for this fabulous recognition!


January also brought one of my favorite projects ever to the pages of Rue Magazine. My Riverside Penthouse looked great in all its dramatic color and it garnered rave reviews. Thanks Rue for the fab feature!

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I had a fabulous time as one of the presenters at the Arts Awards in Dallas. Thank you Dallas Market Center and the Arts Awards for inviting me to be a part of your prestigious event! And congrats to my friends and vendors who won Arts Awards in 2015!


New York City was the site of my design meetings in January with Duralee to develop my upcoming fabric collection. What fun I had with the Duralee team!


February was also full of travel including seeing my CR Laine prototypes for the first time. Here I am test driving what would become my Elle chair.

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We had our first Tobi Fairley Mastermind Event of the year in February in Atlanta and were honored to have Suzanne Kasler, Brian Patrick Flynn, and Richard Mishaan as presenters at our event. It was so inspiring. Thank you Suzanne, Brian, and Richard for being there!



And I jetted off to Sarasota, Florida, and started framing my 120-piece collection for Soicher Marin to get ready for our April launch. Thanks for being such a great collaborator Soicher Marin!

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Plus, Real Simple Magazine asked me to join other fab designers like Nate Berkus and Thom Filicia in giving my Best Design Advice. Thanks, Real Simple!

real simple

In March, another visit to CR Laine’s Hickory, NC, factory over Spring break with my family brought taste-testing a few goodies for the big April High Point Market, and seeing more finished product from my furniture line.

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cr laine visit

And an exciting inclusion in House Beautiful’s color column with one of my favorite shades of orange happened in March, too. Thanks HB!

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April was when things really got exciting. Two big product launches at High Point’s Spring market and a showroom space to design for CR Laine were challenging but rewarding achievements! Thank you CR Laine and Soicher Marin for believing I had something new and creative to bring to your product lines. There are no other partners I would rather have than you and our launches were perfect!

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These launches were made all the more special because I had my mom, my aunt, and my daughter there with me. And they loved seeing the pieces of furniture I named after each of them. What’s all this hard work for if I can’t share it with those that I love, right?


Then in May, the first of many exciting accolades for my product launches started to roll in when Furniture Today named my new collection for CR Laine as its Best of Market. Thank you, Furniture Today!

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And Home Accents Today featured my Bullseye Art for Soicher Marin. Thanks so much, Home Accents Today!

home accents today april

On on the interiors front, May was the month that At Home in Arkansas featured one of my favorite projects for some favorite clients! Thank you At Home and thank you to my lovely clients who are so, so easy to work with!

at home may

HGTV magazine featured my Crestwood Project in their What Color Is That? feature. Thanks HGTV magazine. It’s so fun working with you!

hgtv mayAnother exciting collaboration happened in May when I was named brand ambassador for Thermador and given the opportunity to write blogs and create exclusive video content for this brand that I love so much!

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And speaking of Thermador, next came June and my Tobi Fairley Mastermind event was perfection at the Thermador headquarters in Orange County, CA, thanks to the gorgeous showroom and fantastic hospitality of the Thermador team. And we were so honored to have Timothy Corrigan as our special guest presenter. Thank you to Thermador and to Timothy for one of our best events yet!

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In June, more accolades for my product designs rolled in when my Soicher Marin art called “What Do You See?” was featured in Home Accents Today. Thank you again Home Accents Today!

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And June brought more excitement in the way of product design when we announced my upcoming line of case goods for Woodbridge Furniture, including the Ellison cocktail table pictured below.


July started with a BANG when my new Izzy chair for CR Laine was featured in Traditional Home in all its gingham glory! Thanks again, Traditional Home. You are too good to me!

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And a favorite project of mine appeared on the cover of Southern Cottage Magazine. Much appreciation to you Southern Cottage!

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And in July, more exciting recognition, this time for our online presence when Design NJ named my website one of its Top 15 Places to Click Online. Thanks so much Design New Jersey!

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House & Garden UK featured one of my favorite kitchen projects. Thanks H&G. I love being featured in European shelter magazines, especially yours!

house and garden uk

And in July, hard work began on new lines for High Point Market including my encore collection for CR Laine and my new launch with Woodbridge Furniture. Wow, did my team and I work hard this year creating products for the home!

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July was a big month, and my Alexander chair for CR Laine was featured in Modern Luxury Interiors – Texas. Thank you Modern Luxury. Such an honor to be on your gorgeous pages!

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The readers of Arkansas Times named me Arkansas’s Best Interior Designer. Thank you to Arkansas Times and all its readers!

BEST OF winner 2012

And a fun surprise when my Riverside Penthouse project was featured in Robb Report’s Home & Style. Thank you Robb Report, thank you Tracy Hiner the creative genius behind that gorgeous wallcovering I used in the entry of this chic penthouse and thank you to my adventurous clients who leapt with me to make their home uber-sophisticated and unique!

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Traditional Home was at it again in August when they featured my Hampton Chaise from CR Laine in a feature on snakeskin. My chaise in fabric “Hissy Fit” and its gorgeous lucite legs looked fabulous in this feature. Yes, I will say it again…Thank you Traditional Home!

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You know how I love to cook and entertain, so it was fun being featured in an outdoor entertaining ideas piece in Southern Living. Thank you so much Southern Living!

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Then came September, and was it ever exciting when Veranda featured my Stella screen from CR Laine with its Starburst details in a story about “High Society” and Hollywood Glamour. Thank you, Veranda!


Design NJ gave me more praise this time for my Sheridan daybed from CR Laine. Thank you twice Design New Jersey!

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We hosted another fabulous Mastermind event, this time at the New York Design Center, featuring outstanding designers Rob Passal and Tilton Fenwick, PR guru Andrew Joseph, and the Editor of House Beautiful, Sophie Donelson. This event was stellar! A huge thank you to all these talents who made our event so succesful and also to our amazing Mastermind members!

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Editor at Large is also so good to me and in September they featured the buzz for my new Woodbridge launch at High Point Market. It was one of many features they did on me this year!  Thanks for all your support all year long, Editor at Large!

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In October, my first ad for my CR Laine collection appeared in Traditional Home thanks to my fabulous partners at CR Laine. How exciting to open the pages to see my collection in all this glossy gorgeousness! Thank you CR Laine. You’re the BEST!

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Traditional Home couldn’t get enough of my CR Laine collection and featured my Sheridan Daybed in its October issue. And Traditional Home I can’t get enough of you! Thank you! Thank you!



And one of the most anticipated parts of the year kicked off in October, too. I moved out of my home and started a major renovation. How thrilling to knock down those dated kitchen cabinets with a sledgehammer myself! Woo hoo! Thanks Richard Harp Homes for being my top-notch contractor on this project!

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Plus, October was when I won the ASID 2015 Design Ovation Award for Best Residential Project of the Year for my Riverside Penthouse project, as well as two gold awards and one silver award for other design projects. Wow! Did the Riverside Project have a great year this year! A huge thank you to all my clients, the best clients in the world I might add, for allowing me to bring to life my creative ideas in your homes!


And if October weren’t exciting enough, my brand new launch with Woodbridge Furniture happened at the High Point Market. And this little beauty, my Sarah chest, was Woodbridge’s top-selling piece!  Thank you, Woodbridge. You are a joy to work with! And thank you to the Trim Queen for making those gorgeous tassels!


My new additions and new interpretations of my CR Laine collection also took High Point market by storm in October. My Elle chair in leopard print (called “Catitude”) was a huge seller! A big thank you to Fromental Wallcovering for partnering with me in the CR Laine showroom. Your wallcovering made my space look so totally chic and I thank you!

elle chair cr laine

My friends at Harper Howey interiors hosted my first retail event in October to introduce my CR Laine and Soicher Marin Collections. Thank you Harper Howey and all your fab customers for a great event!


In November, my home and my mom’s were featured in Southern Cottage’s Holiday Issue with our Christmas secor. Thank you again Southern Cottage. You were really good to me this year!

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And one of the most exciting and unexpected things of the year happened this month when Restoration Hardware selected 10 of my Soicher Marin collection pieces for their new RH Modern catalog and put them into 4 of their Flagship Retail Stores. Thank you to Soicher Marin for making this happen and to Restoration Hardware for selecting my work!

restoration hardware

In December, my Sheridan Daybed was featured by House, thanks to a gorgeous room design by Shay Geyer for the One Room Challenge in her daughter’s Kate Spade inspired space. Thank you Shay and House Beautiful. It’s an honor to be a part of this gorgeous room!


December rolled in with my Elle chair for CR Laine in its new Nickel finish, being named Best of Market by Home Accents Today. Thank you once again Home Accents Today!

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And I was named Designer of the Month by Wayfair which was a fun honor. Thank you Wayfair for this great feature!

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Maybe the most exciting part of this month was my launch of my new line of fabric for Duralee at the Showtime Fabric Show in High Point, NC. I have been working on my collection with Duralee for almost 2 years and it was thrilling to see my 79-piece fabric collection all finished and getting fabulous reviews from Duralee’s customers. Thank you Duralee for a great experience. You are a dream to work with and I am so proud of what we created together.

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Thanks to Elle Decor for including me in their top Christmas Decorating Tips.

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And thank you to this neat Russian magazine called Home & Family who also featured my holiday designs. International press is always so exciting!

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And just this week, a fun inclusion by the Wall Street Journal in their Top 5 Design Trends for 2016. Thank you Wall Street Journal, I’m honored to be included in this annual piece on what’s hot and what’s not!


And if all these AMAZING things weren’t enough, I’ve also had fabulous features this year from many other blogs and publications including Martha Stewart, Huffington Post, Lisa Mende, Kandrac and Kole, Decor Mentor and Lisa Kahn Allen, Linda Merrill in her fab new book, The Zhush, Home Goods, many features from, Shutterfly, Carmen at the Decorating Diva, Ruth and Ollie, Domino, Westchester Magazine and so many, many more. I thank each and every one of you so much for your support and recognition. I am truly humbled by all the response to my work and my products this year! If I missed any of you who were a part of my success this year, to you I also say thank you!!

So there is it. An unbelievable year that I am closing the books on. It will go down in my memory as one of “the Big Ones!”.

Thanks again for being a part of it and Happy 2016 to you!

Wishing you a new year of prosperity, health and happiness.


Tobi Signature






A Significant Review

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Can you believe that we are already halfway through 2015? The time is flying by, as it always does, but it just seems to move faster the older I get. I think it’s so important to slow down our “busyness” every now and then and review or look back to see how far we’ve come.

At the beginning of the year, I decided on a word for 2015, and that also set an intention for my year. My word, as you can see above, is Significance. My intention was, and is, to go for Significance as in Intention, Meaning, Essence, Magnitude, Heart, Soul, and Spirit. All the things I choose for 2015 must be “significant” or important – really important to ME. They should touch my heart and fill my spirit. That has meant being VERY honest with myself about what I want and, more importantly, what I don’t want. And it means having the guts to say no to things.


This is such a HARD thing for us, particularly for those of us who are women, to do in our lives. We’re either saying “yes” to every single thing at work because we think it will make us more successful, or we’re saying “yes” to insignificant things out of guilt or a false sense of obligation. In business and in life, we think there will be some judgement held against us if we say NO. So instead we find ourselves saying yes and as a result, we’re frazzled, burned out, and crazy!

And the problem with saying YES to everything, is that we cannot be SIGNIFICANT – we can’t really make a difference if we’re stretching ourselves so thin that we’re about to snap. You may remember that one of my favorite quotes is “You have to say no to the good, so you can say yes to the GREAT!”


Now – how am I doing with my intention so far this year? Well, I have definitely started saying “no” more often. And I have found great joy in reaching MAJOR goals that I’ve wanted to achieve for years…Significant goals! I launched my first product lines with CR Laine and Soicher Marin, and I also unveiled Tobi U, my online learning center for designers and creatives. It is incredible to see those dreams come true.

I’ve also been able to take my mom and my daughter on my business trips, which makes that travel much more fun. My top priority is family, and the only way I can be really happy is to make sure I am there for all the important things at home and then take them along every chance I get. I know I will look back on the significance of having the people I love with me for many highlights of my career and hopefully they will, too.

But yes, I could do better in some of the other areas, like finding time to relax and spending more downtime with friends. And I just happen to be taking care of those two things this month with a fun trip to the beach in Florida with friends and family! And I know my work will be more significant when I get back because I will be rested and refreshed.


The best thing about doing this mid-year review, though, is that it refocuses our attention on those goals that we’ve set for ourselves. It’s so easy to get bogged down with the daily challenges and responsibilities of life, that we forget what we really wanted this year to be. And we find ourselves falling into old habits that are not aligned with our intentions at all. We can often find ourselves missing out on the fabulous forest we desire because we can’t see past those pesky old trees!

So far on the BIG things this year, I am doing really well. Knocking them out of the park to be exact. And now that I have given myself a little check up, I can re-adjust some of the details in my life so at the end of 2015 I can have all those little things whipped into shape, too. Because it’s the little things that can often have the biggest impact, isn’t it?

I just need a few tweaks and then I can truly say that I lived with SIGNIFICANCE this year. So how are you doing with your 2015 goals? Let me know in the comments below! Meanwhile, I hear the beach calling my name!








Monday Inspiration

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I spent the weekend in the most fabulous way – I was at the CR Laine factory in Hickory, NC, to look over the samples of my new furniture line that debuts in April at the High Point Market! It was so exciting, and SO inspiring!

I cannot wait to show you the new upholstery pieces – they look fantastic, and they didn’t even have the fabrics on them yet!


I wish I could show you everything, including the amazing floorplan with all of the fabrics and furnishings laid out in the CR Laine showroom – but I can tell you that this collection will be all about COLOR! That shouldn’t surprise you, right?!

In just a few months, I can show it all to you! Until then, look for a few more sneak peeks on my Instagram feed in the weeks leading up to the April Market!

Happy Monday!